Loving on the road - Update

Here is an update to the lyrics of "Loving on the Road", previously known as Untitled Song 1. I went with the second option for the bridge (discussed in a previous post) and have lyrics for the bridge as well as a first cut of the lyrics for the final verse. Here are the lyrics so far

When I first went out on the road
It was exciting it was fun
Loneliness was not invited in
We were quite the rowdy ones
Out on the road I saw many towns
But it's not new, the thrill is gone

Chorus
Don't hate me, don't hate me
I was always true
But when it comes to loving on the road
I will still want you

Never saw a pretty face
To match you, they could not match you
Your voice lingers on my mind
You're with me, you're still with me
I don't know how I could go on
Without you, I need you

Bridge
I slip back to my hotel room
Look out the window pretend I see you
I don't notice the night has gone by
I don't notice it's dawn
It's dawn

It's dawn and I am off again
Another day, another town
Soon I will be heading home
I am such the lucky one

Please love me, please love me
I was always true
When it comes to lovin on the road
I will still want you

I will still want you

The transition from the bridge back to the chorus does something that is sometimes done in a song to help make it stick in the listener's mind and that is repeating a line or phrase. I have to thank Larry Rice (my voice/songwriting coach) for this one. If you look at the end of the bridge the lyrics are

I don't notice it's dawn
It's dawn

It's dawn and I am off again

The last phrase of the bridge (it's dawn) is repeated after the bridge and then carried into the first line of the verse. I think it works well. Also at Larry's suggestion, I changed the final chorus by changing "don't hate me" with "please love me". That is why it is always good to have another person to listen to your songs and get different ideas and perspectives.

Well, I now have a first cut at the complete song and a good first cut at the melody. The next update will probably just be tweaks to the lyrics and melody. I still need to record the song, in it's current state , so you can get an idea of how it sounds and I will do that and update this post as soon as I get this done.

Update: here is a recording of the song as it is now.

Loving on the Road - Second Version by tazthecat

As always, enjoy

-Ron-