New Song - Forever Stay

Here is a new song called "Forever Stay". It started out as a "Homework Assignment" from my voice instructor and songwriting coach (Larry Rice) to write a sone using a different form of the A form bar chord. The song I wrote was in C so the root chord is fingered as (X 7 5 5 5 5). Using that as a start, I played around with different chord and tried different hammer-on and pull-offs but nothing seemed to work. For those of you that are not guitar players, a hammer-on is when you play a note on a guitar string and while that not is playing, you put your finger down on a different note. Pull-offs are the opposite, you remove your finger while you are playing a note. Anyhow, back to the song. I went back to the non-bar C chord and worked from there. I started playing the C - Dm - G7 progression and that sounded pretty good so I tried playing that progression at the same neck position as the original C chord and it worked. I worked on this some more and found a riff that worked, That was the original verse. For the chorus, I used a chord progression that started at the Am bar chord (5th fret 5-5-7-7-6-5) and progressed down to the F chord and then back to toe G chord (Am G F G) and then back to the funky C chord. That was OK for now but I new I needed to make changes to the chorus later. Now onto some lyrics. I normally play the chords and tryout lyrics and I hit upon some lyrics about a lost love that were promising. After some work here were the start of some lyrics for the verse.

Looking back to what I said
To figure out what I had done wrong
A blank expression mirrors what I have found

The frown on your face shows the pain
The tears in your eye can not stop them
Rain down on me like a raging storm

I see your face but don't hear your voice
A fleeting glance of what I have lost
Starting over is harder than it seems


At this point I was also working on the chord progression for the bridge and the fifth up from the root (G in this case) is a good place to start for the bridge. So I came up with the progression G - C - F - C but that was kind of boring for the whole bridge so tried a chord progression up the scale and that worked out nice. That progression is C - Dm - (skip the Em) F - G - C. So the bridge was G - C - F - C - C - Dm - F - G - C. Now for some lyrics. I was playing the bridge and the words for the second half of the bridge popped into my head "I didn't know that you were walking away. When I thought that you would forever stay". So I worked on the lyrics some more and was able to come up with the first half of the bridge "I thought my love was enough. To keep you here even though time were tough". So now I have the bridge finished. I needed lyrics for the chorus and some more lyrics for the verses.

For the chorus, I continued the the feeling of dread and loss of someone losing the person they love. So I came up with the lyrics "Feeling dark since I can't see you. Knowing that your love passed me by". The first line is kind of unusual but I wanted to use the double meaning of "dark" in this line. Dark as in depressed and also dark as in the absence of light which ties into the words "can't see you" (which also has a double meaning). OK, the chorus is somewhat done (I needed to work on the chord progression and melody but that was for later).

I needed to finish the lyrics for the verses so I continued the theme from the other verses but I also wanted to convey the sense that the main character really doesn't know why this person left him/her. The lyrics for the remaining verses are:

I was strong when I was with you
A carefree life without any troubles
So happy, I did not see the storm

Sometimes my words are not so thoughtful
Don’t mean what they seam, can sound awful
I’d take them back if I knew the pain they cause

Living the life I lived before
Now alone to carry on
with a life that a ghost of what it was


I went into the next lesson with Larry with my new song and played it for him. He immediately got that expression on his face that says "Not bad but...". The first change he suggested was in the verse and suggested replacing the riff with the chords Dm7 - Em7 - Dm7 while I was singing the verse. That progression sounded cleaner and the change in melody to accommodate the chord change sounded more interesting so I mage that change. The second change was the melody on the bridge. I wasn't happy with what I wrote and his changes made it much better. So I worked on those changes for a week and the the next lesson I played Larry the new version of the song. AT that point he thought that the bridge was too strong to be the bridge so he suggested I make that the chorus and what I had as the chorus the bridge. He also suggested a slight change in how the song returned to the C chord in each line of the (now) chorus. On the F-C chord change he suggested staying on the F chord an extra half beat and the melody changes from going to B-E to B-F-E. On the G-C change he suggested the first time using the progression G-Csus2-C and the second tine using the progression G-Cmag7-C. When you hear the demo I recorded you will hear how those chord changes work. The last suggestion was to make the chord progression and melody more interesting on the (now) bridge.

I worked of this a little bit and want the bridge to have a bit of a tie-in with the chorus so I changed the progression to Am - Em - Dm - F - C. Since Am is harmonically similar to the C chord (the key of Am contains the same noted as C major), the progression is similar to the second part of the chorus progression except the first chord is Am instead of C and it includes the Em chord. This was close but not there yet. I wanted to add a twist into the chord progression so I substituted a Bdim chord for the F chord and that was it.

I cleaned up some of the lyrics and added a second part to the bridge so here is the completed song:

I was strong when I was with you
A carefree life without any troubles
So happy, I did not see the storm

Looking back to what I said
To figure out what I had done wrong
My blank expression mirrors what I found

Chorus;
G C F F-C
I thought my love was enough
C Dm F G Csus2-C
To keep you here even though things were tough
G C F F-C
Had no idea/ that you were walking away
C Dm F G Cmag7-C
When I thought that you would forever stay


Sometimes my words are not so thoughtful
Don’t mean what they seam, can sound awful
I’d take them back if I knew the pain they caused

The frown you wear tells the story
The tears in your eyes, can not stop them
Rain down on me like a raging storm

[Chorus]

Bridge:
Am Em Dm Bdim Am
Feeling dark since I..... can’t see you
Am Em Dm Bdim Am
Knowing that your love has passed me by
So alone I feel I can’t go on
Missing the love I tasted before

I see your face but it’s not beside me
A fleeting glance of what I have lost
Starting over is harder than it seems

Living the life I lived before
Now alone to carry on
with a life that a ghost of what it was

[Chorus]


I recorded a demo of the finished song and put it on soundcloud. You can listen to it here:

Forever Stay Demo by tazthecat

Sorry for the long post but I wanted to tell everyone about the new song and I had finished it before I could write about the progress on the song. Anyway I hope you find my discussion on the writing of this song interesting or at least mildly entertaining.

Enjoy,

-ron-